every time
your eyes meet mine
i can hear my heart
thump-thump-thumping
trying to break out of my rib cage
just to be closer to you
& every time
you open your lips to say my name
my cheeks flush previously uncharted depths of red
because the sound of your voice
whispering something that i call mine
makes my ears melt
and my fingertips tremble
and i absorb your words through my skin and bloodstream
where they effloresce inside my giddy, schoolgirl soul
& every time
i see you with another girl
my throat closes
and my stomach drops
like i've just jumped off a twenty story building
my eyes flutter shut
as if me not seeing you would be
a panacea to you not loving me
and I try to squeeze out the voice of my cruel, cruel mind
relentlessly reminding me
"you will never be her"
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